Improbable Research

At year’s end, the acceptance speeches of the 2004 Ig Nobel Prize winners are, perhaps, worth pondering.

A hamster-powered night light enthusiast has created a hamster-powered night light with a custom low-RPM alternator.

(Thanks to investigator Dan Fingerman for bringing this to our attention.)

The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (formerly and lovingly known as the Centers for Disease Control) have/has issued a statistics-based safety reminder for New Year’s Eve celebrants. The full report appears in the December 24, 2004 issue of MMWR. Here are some highlights:

New Year’s Eve Injuries Caused by Celebratory Gunfire — Puerto Rico, 2003

Bullets fired into the air during celebrations fall with sufficient force to cause injury and death (1). However, few data exist regarding the epidemiology of injuries related to celebratory gunfire. In Puerto Rico, where such celebratory actions are common, news media reports have indicated that approximately two persons die and an estimated 25 more are injured each year from celebratory gunfire on New Year’s Eve. The Puerto Rico Department of Health (PRDOH) invited CDC and local law enforcement agencies to assist in the investigation of injuries resulting from celebratory gunfire that occurred during December 31, 2003–January 1, 2004. This report summarizes the findings of that investigation….

A probable celebratory gunfire injury was defined as an unintentional firearm injury (International Classification of Diseases, Tenth Revision codes W32–W34 [2]) inflicted outdoors by an unidentified assailant during the 48-hour period beginning 12 a.m., December 31, 2003, and ending 11:59 p.m., January 1, 2004. Available information regarding the injury or event had to be consistent with the return trajectory of a bullet fired into the air….

(Thanks to Kristine Danowski for bringing this to our attention.)

"Boys Will Be Boys." The column of that name runs in every issue of the Annals of Improbable Research. The column from the November-December issue is on our web site, as well as in the magazine.

The report "Testing a Language-Using Parrot for Telepathy," by Rupert Sheldrake and Aimée Morgana, includes these provocatively calming words of confident caution:

[T]hese experiments provide compelling evidence of interspecies telepathy. This phenomenon is currently unexplained within the dominant scientific model.

(Thanks to investigator Audrey Devine-Eller for bringing this to our attention.)

Do you truly have restless legs? Consider, then, the work of the Restless Legs Syndrome Foundation.

Pediatric reactions to Santa Claus are photo-documented in a new research project. Based in South Florida, the project would seem to confirm the disturbing findings reported last year (and  subsequently in more detail) by 2003 Ig Nobel Literature Prize winner John Trinkaus.

Once again, thanks to Popular Science magazine, there is a list of the worst jobs in science.

There’s much info available about Professor Jesus Mastache Roman, the scholar who was the unfortunate posthumous victim of a typographical error that converted him into the memorably named Jesus Mustache Roman.

Professor Mastache’s son, Alberto Mastache, has compiled a good deal of biographical and other knowledge about Professor Mastache. 

(Thanks to Alberto Mastache for alerting us to this.)

The Chinese edition of the book The Ig Nobel Prizes is now out.

Norman Hutchins has been banned from every hospital, according to a report by the BBC, and reports elsewhere, including the pervert-reportage-specializing Mirror.

Gordon Ramel loves insects. He has written poetry, and he is trying to educate a sometimes unappreciative world.

Here is an educational effort that appeared recently on the ENTOMO-L discussion list. Gordon Ramel responded to this inquiry:

FROM: Erin Johnson

I’m working on a television series about entertaining ‘bugs’ (I use the term ‘bugs’ in its loosest possible sense!) and I’m wondering which bugs entomologists find entertaining. Which bugs make you guys laugh out loud?

I’ve heard of people dancing with mantids and getting stick insects to dance to music, but are there other bugs that you can have fun with or that have particularly humorous behaviour?

Erin Johnson
Researcher
NHNZ
Dunedin
New Zealand

http://www.nhnz.tv

Here is Gordon Ramel’s educational reply. (Note that he began by discreetly informing E. Johnson that E does not stand for Erin):

FROM:  Gordon Ramel

Eric,

I hate to say this but the ideas you suggest are ludicrous, and that is being polite.  The world will be much better off without the program you are thinking of making, it is an insult to both nature and humanity, a perfect example of how stupid people can get when they worship money.

Bugs do not make me laugh because unlike people they live in harmony with God and all their actions are beautiful.  What you want to do is plain ugly.

Gordon Ramel

The Earthlife Web

Investigator Wendy Grossman has had an adventure that can be expressed by the equation:

y = skeptic + psychic + television

Investigator Grossman sent us a full report, with the special instruction to "Be sure to follow the link to the original blog entry in first paragraph."

We have been reading strange reports about the celebrated Dr. Henry Heimlich of Heimlich Maneuver fame. A report in the December 8 issue of the Detroit Metro Times is headlined "Off the Deep End."

We ourselves recently  encountered and heartily enjoyed the stirring book "Milk: The Deadly Poison," co-authored glowingly by Dr. Heimlich’s wife, Jane Heimlich.

Ben Goldacre of The Guardian has just announced this year’s crop of Bad Science Award winners. One of our favorites is Dr. Ali ("Britain’s top integrated health expert") of Harley Street, whose eminence and apparent lack of an MD degree have been remarked upon by admirers and passers-by.

(Thanks to Linda Rosa for bringing this to our attention.)