Ingenious: Sleep on Wrong Side, Get Cancer

Today’s Ingenious Theory of the Week will excite most anyone who (1) hopes that electromagnetic waves of all frequencies cause cancer and/or (2) gets into bed on the wrong side:

Sleep on the right side—Get cancer on the left? Örjan Hallberg and Olle Johansson, Pathophysiology, vol. 17, no. 3, June 2010, pp. 157-60. The authors, at Hallberg Independent Research in Trångsund, Sweden, and at the Karolinska Insitute in Stockholm, explain:

“Here we show that a high prevalence of breast cancer and melanoma on the left side of the body may be a logical consequence of sleeping in beds having mattresses containing wave-reflecting metal springs. We found that people tend to sleep for longer periods on their right side, apparently to avoid disturbance by the heartbeat. This puts the left side farther away from the field-attenuating influence of the metal springs in the mattress; thus the left side will spend, on average, more time exposed to stronger combined fields from incident and reflected waves. This hypothesis may also explain why body parts farthest away from the mattress (trunk and upper arms for men; lower limbs and hips for women) have higher melanoma rates than the sun-exposed face area.”

BONUS: Dr. Hallberg, TV star, explains all.