HotAIR - AIRHEAD TECH NOTES -- Middle East Peace Solution Complications

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AIRHEAD TECH NOTES--
Middle East Peace Solution Complications

by Pelham Grenville, AIR staff

Recently we published a workable Middle East peace solution. It offered two alternative solutions:

SOLUTION #1. Unite all the Semites against a common enemy. Give Jerusalem back to the British.

SOLUTION #2. Give Jerusalem back to ex-Ottomans. Then everybody, even the British, will join against them.

The Middle East being the Middle East, complaints have arisen, as have counter-complaints, counter-alternatives, and many other variations. Here are some of them.

The Complaints

From investigator Eli Lansey:

On the page that you targeted us to it is written: "Should Jerusalem be given to: a) the Israelis or b) the Palestinians?" It should read: "Should Jerusalem be LEFT WITH to: a) the Israelis or b) GIVEN TO the Palestinians?

Jerusalem is currently in Israeli hands, and therefor should be listed as such.

From Master Investigator Harry Lipkin:

Since the majority of Jerusalemites who control the politics of Jerusalem want to turn it into a Polish Shtetl, why not give sovereignty over Jerusalem to Poland? The Western Wall after all was built under the soveriegnty of the Roman Empire, and the attempt by some crazy Jews to replace this with Jewish Soveriegnty ended in disaster with 2000 years of exile. So who needs Jewish svereignty. An added advantage for Israel would be to make all the inhabitants of the shtetl Polish citizens not allowed to vote in Israeli elections.

From investigator Inga Karliner, in response to Master Investigator Harry Lipkin:

I like the idea, but shouldn't you first ask Poland? I seem to remember that they have enough troubles with Russians and Germans, but who knows?

From Master Investigator Harry Lipkin, in response to investigator Inga Karliner:

Actually I would suggest Luxembourg. Poland is too powerful! But a great idea.

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