October 2, 1999
TEA BUT NO SYMPATHY FOR WORDY BREW
British standards watchdogs were yesterday
unmasked as the world's top
wafflers after producing a 5,000-word guide to making
an ordinary cup of tea.
The British Standards Institute beat
a host of wordy opponents to win one of
ten Ig Nobels - an American spoof on the Nobel prizes
for scientific and
artistic excellence.
A panel of Harvard University academics
unveiled the snappily-titled BS
6008: Method for Preparation of a Liquor of Tea as its
unanimous choice for the
literary award at a parallel ceremony in Massachusetts.
The six-page work, which lays out in
mind-boggling detail how to brew the
definitive British cuppa, was selected after meeting
the key Ig Nobel criteria
of being a feat that "cannot or should not be reproduced".
Bosses at the London-based body, whose
Washington representative was
symbolically pelted with dry tea bags as he accepted
the gong, reacted to the
doubtful honour with a good grace.
The prize-winning BS 6008, drawn up
to set a standard for professional tea
testers and also known as ISO 3103 to global tea fanatics,
lays down the law on
brewing up right down to the type of vessel to be used.
The BSI's tea manifesto was not the
only contribution to beverage science
from Britain to be honoured at the Ig Nobels.
Bristol University lecturer Mr Len
Fisher received a prize for his work on
soggy biscuits.
Physics researcher Mr Fisher was in
Boston to receive his award for finding
the best technique to dunk a biscuit in a cup of tea
or coffee before it reduces
to a sticky mess and naming the most suitable brands.
Here is an abridged version of the
British Standards Institute's six-page BS
6008: Method for The Preparation of a Liquor of Tea for
Use in Sensory Tests:
l Use 2g of tea - to a margin of error
of plus or minus 2 per cent - for
every 100ml of water.
l Tea flavour and appearance will be
affected by the hardness of the water
used.
l The pot must be filled to within
4-6mm of the brim with freshly boiling
water.
l After the lid has been placed on
top, the pot must be left to brew for
precisely six minutes.
l Milk should be added at a ratio of 1.75ml of milk for every 100ml of tea.
l The pot should be lifted with the
lid held in place, then "pour tea
through the infused leaves into the cup".
l Pour in tea on top of milk to prevent
scalding the milk. If you pour your
milk in last the best results are with a liquor temperature
of 65- 80C.