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The mini-Annals of Improbable Research ("mini-AIR")
Issue number 2004-05
May 2004
ISSN 1076-500X
Key words: improbable research, science humor, Ig Nobel, AIR, the
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A free newsletter of tidbits too tiny to fit in the
Annals of Improbable Research (AIR),
the journal of inflated research and personalities
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2004-05-01 TABLE OF CONTENTS
2004-05-01 Table of Contents
2004-05-02 Soon...
2004-05-03 What's New in the Magazine
2004-05-04 RESEARCH SPOTLIGHT: The Sniffing of Efficient Clerks
2004-05-05 Historic Bear Suit
2004-05-06 Project Nano
2004-05-07 Nano Nota Bene
2004-05-08 Science of Cooking: Sponges
2004-05-09 Walked Knots Poet
2004-05-10 Posthumous Politics Proliferates
2004-05-11 Sorgenfrey-Line Limerick Contest
2004-05-12 On the Blog
2004-05-13 MAY WE RECOMMEND: Hernia, Grizzly Bear, and Espresso
2004-05-14 AIRhead Events
2004-05-15 How to Subscribe to AIR (*)
2004-05-16 Our Address (*)
2004-05-17 Please Forward/Post This Issue! (*)
2004-05-18 How to Receive mini-AIR, etc. (*)
Items marked (*) are reprinted in every issue.
mini-AIR is
a free monthly *e-supplement* to AIR, the print magazine
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2004-05-02 Soon...
Hay Festival, Hay-on-Wye, Wales
Saturday morning, June 5, 9:00.
There will be an AIR show, the first ever at
a literary festival. Details:
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2004-05-03 What's New in the Magazine
The March/April issue (vol. 10, no. 2) is the special "Way to Go"
issue. Highlights include:
<> "SOME OF PROFESSOR LESTER'S WORKS." A list of the titles of
more than 1000 of the suicidal works of the prolific Professor
David Lester of The Richard Stockton College of New Jersey. (NOTE:
This same issue of the magazine also includes a lavish
appreciation and description of a select few dozen of Professor
Lester's research projects.)
<> "THE SUICIDOMETER," by Marc M. Sadowsky. The acclaimed
psychiatrist explains his new device, which measures whether a
suicidal patient is sufficiently suicidal to satisfy health
insurance strictures.
<> "FORGOTTEN MEN OF SCIENCE: NIMROD," by Acacia Seewall. A new
look at a nearly-forgotten toothless and bear-ridden Alaskan
scientist.
and many others...
The table of contents is online at
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2004-05-04 RESEARCH SPOTLIGHT: The Sniffing of Efficient Clerks
Each month we select for your special attention a research report
that seems especially worth a close read. Your librarian will
enjoy being asked (loudly, so other library patrons can hear it)
for a copy. Here is this month's Pick-of-the-Month:
"Improved Performance on Clerical Tasks
Associated With Administration of Peppermint Odor,"
S. Barker, et al., Perceptual and Motor Skills,
vol. 97, no. 3, part 1, December 2003, pp. 1007-10.
The authors are at Wheeling Jesuit University,
West Virginia.
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2004-05-05 Historic Bear Suit
As predicted last month, the Hurtubise probably-grizzly-bear-proof
suit-of-armor is now -- RIGHT NOW -- up for bid on Ebay.
Bidding ends May 14.
The suit deserves a place of honor in some great museum. If you
run such a museum, or if you would like to purchase the suit and
start a great museum around it, or if you have a problem with
grizzly bears, bid on the suit at:
Troy won an Ig Nobel Prize for developing and personally testing
this suit. It and he attained fame also from the documentary film
"Project Grizzly."
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2004-05-06 Project Nano
Nano, Nano, Nano.
Nano is hot.
Nano is sexy.
Nano is the prime Minister of Albania.
Please join us in the launch of PROJECT NANO. The project will
gather news and scientific gossip about the scientific and
technical thoughts of nano-technology's favorite prime minister --
Nano Fatsos, the Prime Minister of Albania.
For Nano biographies, see
If you have an item of news to contribute, please send it,
together with a documentary URL, to:
"PROJECT NANO"
c/o
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2004-05-07 Nano Nota Bene
It should be mentioned that Prime Minister Nano Fatsos recently
won a Nano contest. See
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2004-05-08 Science of Cooking: Sponges
There is a partial answer to Investigator Paul O. Lee's question
(last month): "Is it easier to eat boiled sponge or unboiled
sponge?"
Investigator Chana Lajcher sends this pointer to a discussion of
eating unboiled sponge of a particular type:
The answer to the question of boiled-sponge eating, and to the
larger question of eating sea-sponge, is still untouched-upon.
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2004-05-09 Walked Knots Poet
The judges in the first and last annual WALKED KNOTS LIMERICK
COMPETITION have chosen the winner, who in some sense explored the
research report:
"Designing Tie Knots by Random Walks,"
Thomas M. Fink, Yong Mao, Nature, vol. 398,
March 4, 1999, pp. 31-2.
The winner will receive a free, randomly walkable issue of the
Annals of Improbable Research. Here is the triumphant poet and her
limerick:
INVESTIGATOR LOIS C. COOKSEY:
When fashion and physics collide,
You're in for a wild, random ride.
But mathematical wiles
Netted six nice new styles,
So you cannot not have your knot tied!
The runner up is:
INVESTIGATOR MARTIN EIGER:
Random walks of Tom Fink and Yong Mao
On triangular grids show us how
To tie neckties in knots:
Pratt and Windsor and lots
Of new knots, once unknown, but known now.
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2004-05-10 Posthumous Politics Proliferates
Last month we reported that 2003 Peace Prize winner Lal Bihari,
founder of the Association of Dead People, is running for
political office.
It turns out that he is not alone in his quest. Shiv Dutt Yadav,
another member of the Association of Dead People is standing for
office against Prime Minister Atal Behari Vajpayee. (Vajpayee
himself is a former Ig Nobel Prizewinner, by the way.) For
details, see
Odds are that both Lal Bihari and Shiv Dutt Yadav will end up dead
last.
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2004-05-11 Sorgenfrey-Line Limerick Contest
We invite you to enter the first and last annual SORGENFREY-LINE
LIMERICK COMPETITION, for the best (NEWLY composed!) limerick that
elucidates this research report,
"Subspaces of the Sorgenfrey Line," Dennis K. Burke
and Justin Tatch Moore, Topology and its Applications,
vol. 90, nos. 1-3, 1998, pp. 57-68.
A copy is available online at
RULES: Please make sure your rhymes actually do, and that your
limerick at least pretends to adhere to classic limerick form.
PRIZE: The winning poet will receive a free, subspace issue of the
Annals of Improbable Research. Send entries (one entry per
entrant) to:
SORGENFREY-LINE LIMERICK CONTEST
c/o
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2004-05-12 On the Blog
Here are some recent topics (a new one appears every weekday) in
our blog:
Gross National Happiness
Home-Grown Growth Curves
Wiggling, Shrunken Heads, Sopranos
Angular Momentum - Groundhog
Veiled Cancer Risk?
Dikshit Jr Hits the Road
Fall Guy / Penguin
The David Brent Syndrome
Reach the blog via
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2004-05-13 MAY WE RECOMMEND: Hernia, Grizzly Bear, and Espresso
INTERNAL ADVENTURE
"A Thrilling Case of Hiatus Hernia," J. Gleadle and M. Dennis,
Postgraduate Medical Journal, vol. 65, no. 769, November 1989, pp.
832-4.
USAGE VARIES ACCORDING TO TASTE
"Use of Ungulates by Yellowstone Grizzly Bears Ursus arctos,"
David J. Mattson, Biological Conservation, vol. 81, nos. 1-2,
July-August 1997, pp. 161-77.
DANGER D'ESPRESSO
"Espresso Maker's Wrist," D. Shusterman, Western Journal of
Medicine, vol. 152, no. 6, June 1990, pp. 721-2.
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2004-05-14 AIRhead Events
==> For details and updates see
==> Want to host an event? 617-491-4437.
==>
THE HAY FESTIVAL, HAY-ON-WYE, WALES -- SAT, JUN 5, 2004
9:00 AM
AIR editor Marc Abrahams will eat shoots and leaves, and/or show
and tell all about improbable research and the Ig Nobel Prizes.
INFO:
AUSTRALIA, NATIONAL SCIENCE WEEK TOUR -- AUG. 2004
[Tentatively scheduled].
ALPBACH TECHNOLOGY FORUM, AUSTRIA -- AUG. 26-28, 2004
ANNUAL IG NOBEL PRIZE CEREMONY -- THURS, SEP. 30, 2004
HARVARD UNIVERSITY
IG INFORMAL LECTURES 2004 -- SAT, OCT. 2, 2004
MIT
WAYNE STATE UNIVERSITY, DETROIT, MI -- FRI, OCT. 29, 2004
9:00 AM
AIR editor MARC ABRAHAMS will be the keynote speaker at the
Undergraduate Research Conference.
IG NOBEL TOUR OF THE U.K. AND IRELAND
FOR NATIONAL SCIENCE WEEK -- MAR. 11-20, 2005
CASCADIACON, SEATTLE -- THURS, SEPT 1 - MON, SEPT. 5, 2005
North American Science Fiction Convention.
AIR editor MARC ABRAHAMS will be the Science Guest of Honor
INFO: http://www.cascadiacon.org
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2004-05-15 How to Subscribe to AIR (*)
Here's how to subscribe to the magnificent bi-monthly print
journal The Annals of Improbable Research (the real thing, not
just the little bits of overflow material you've been reading in
this newsletter).
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Name:
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BACK ISSUES are available, too:
First issue: $8 USA, $11 Canada/Mex, $16 overseas Add'l issues
purchased at same time: $6 each
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Send payment (US bank check, or international money order, or
Visa, Mastercard or Discover info) to:
Annals of Improbable Research (AIR)
PO Box 380853, Cambridge, MA 02238 USA
617-491-4437 FAX:617-661-0927
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2004-05-16 Our Address (*)
Annals of Improbable Research (AIR)
PO Box 380853, Cambridge, MA 02238 USA
617-491-4437 FAX:617-661-0927
EDITORIAL: marca@chem2.harvard.edu
SUBSCRIPTIONS: air@improbable.com
WEB SITE:
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2004-05-17 Please Forward/Post This Issue! (*)
Please distribute copies of mini-AIR (or excerpts!) wherever
appropriate. The only limitations are: A) Please indicate that the
material comes from mini-AIR. B) You may NOT distribute mini-AIR
for commercial purposes.
------------- mini-AIRheads -------------
EDITOR: Marc Abrahams (marca@chem2.harvard.edu)
MINI-PROOFREADER AND PICKER OF NITS (before we introduce the last
few at the last moment): Wendy Mattson
WWW EDITOR/GLOBAL VILLAGE IDIOT: Amy Gorin
(airmaster@improbable.com)
COMMUTATIVE EDITOR: Stanley Eigen (eigen@neu.edu)
ASSOCIATIVE EDITOR: Mark Dionne
PSYCHOLOGY EDITOR: Robin Abrahams
CO-CONSPIRATORS: Alice Shirrell Kaswell, Gary Dryfoos, Ernest
Ersatz, S. Drew
MAITRE DE COMPUTATION: Jerry Lotto
AUTHORITY FIGURES: Nobel Laureates Dudley Herschbach, Sheldon
Glashow, William Lipscomb, Richard Roberts
(c) copyright 2004, Annals of Improbable Research
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2004-05-18 How to Receive mini-AIR, etc. (*)
What you are reading right now is mini-AIR. Mini-AIR is a (free!)
tiny monthly *supplement* to the bi-monthly print magazine.
To subscribe, send a brief E-mail message to:
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