PLEASE FORWARD/POST AS APPROPRIATE ================================================================ The mini-Annals of Improbable Research ("mini-AIR") Issue number 2005-12 December 2005 ISSN 1076-500X Key words: improbable research, science humor, Ig Nobel, AIR, the ---------------------------------------------------------------- A free newsletter of tidbits too tiny to fit in the bi-monthly paper magazine Annals of Improbable Research (AIR) ================================================================ ----------------------------- 2005-12-01 TABLE OF CONTENTS 2005-12-02 What's New in the Magazine 2005-12-03 How Distracting...? 2005-12-04 Know-Thine-Own-Self Results (1) 2005-12-05 Know-Thine-Own-Self Survey, Part 2 2005-12-06 Vapid Pursuit of the Vapid (Part 3) 2005-12-07 Project Professor-Professor 2005-12-08 Alimentary Canal Poet 2005-12-09 Knotted Intestines 2005-12-10 Watch Roy's Sweeping Success 2005-12-11 Mucho Hair (LFHCfS) 2005-12-12 Grasping-for-Pasta Limerick Contest 2005-12-13 RESEARCH SPOTLIGHT: Persistence Pays Off 2005-12-14 On Our Blog 2005-12-15 MAY WE RECOMMEND: Hair 21; Quality of Life (toes) 2005-12-16 Improbable Research Events 2005-12-17 How to Subscribe to AIR (*) 2005-12-18 Our Address (*) 2005-12-19 Please Forward/Post This Issue! (*) 2005-12-20 How to Receive mini-AIR, etc. (*) Items marked (*) are reprinted in every issue. mini-AIR is a free monthly *e-supplement* to AIR, the print magazine ---------------------------------------------------------- 2005-12-02 What's New in the Magazine The Nov/Dec issue (vol. 11, no. 6) of the Annals of Improbable Research is the annual special IG NOBEL PRIZE issue. The entire table of contents is at , as are three of the articles: <> Overview of the 2005 Ig Nobel Prize Ceremony <> The Infinite Lectures <> Libretto to the mini-opera "The Count of Infinity" The issue will be emerging from the printer quite soon now. A subscription (6 issues per year) makes an inexpensively perfec (except for typos), reiterative gift for your favorite impossible- to-choose-a-gift-for researcher. ---------------------------------------------------------- 2005-12-03 How Distracting...? "When a young man masturbates, exactly how distracted does he get? An experiment performed on students at the University of California, Berkeley aimed to find out. Full details are in a study to be published in the Journal of Behavioral Decision Making. Dan Ariely, of the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, and George Loewenstein, of Carnegie Mellon University, in Pittsburgh, describe their arousing achievement in dry, formal terms...." So begins our report about the report. Full details are at . A copy of the report itself is at . ---------------------------------------------------------- 2005-12-04 Know-Thine-Own-Self Results (1) Here are the results of Part 1 of the KNOW-THINE-OWN-SELF SURVEY. The survey asked authors and co-authors of research reports: Of the references listed in your papers, what percentage have you actually read? As a group, the authors and co-authors report that they have read: <> ALL OF 66% of the reference works they cited <> JUST A SUMMARY OF 32% of those reference works <> ONLY THE NAME OF 02% of those reference works Some respondents, who tended more than other respondents to express outrage, report that they have read all of their cited reference works. More typical are the respondents who say they skimmed or read the "relevant portions" of nearly all of the cited works, and read all of at least half of them. Here is one survey response, as typical as almost any other. INVESTIGATOR BILL DERSHOWITZ writes: Over the course of 30 years of publications, I estimate these averages (of course there is huge variation between papers): A) read all of -- 15% (or at least tried to...) B) read just a summary of -- 1% C) read only the name of -- 30% (because I am using a reference from someone else's citation) D) skimmed for content of interest -- 54% ---------------------------------------------------------- 2005-12-05 Know-Thine-Own-Self Survey, Part 2 Please answer, if you will and only if it applies to you, Part 2 of the survey: QUESTION: Have you read every one of the research papers on which you yourself are listed as a co-author? Please send your answer to: KNOW-THINE-OWN-SELF SURVEY (PART 2) c/o ---------------------------------------------------------- 2005-12-06 Vapid Pursuit of the Vapid (Part 3) How many vapid, scientifical corporate slogans are there? More, perhaps than are dreamt of by some of our philosophically hopeful readers. Here comes another. INVESTIGATOR NATALIE HAMPTON writes: "A colleague suggested I send you the following link to the Sherwin-Williams website and charming logo (wait just a moment for it to appear), at ." [NOTE: Those of a certain noirishly romantic turn may intuit some menacing overtones.] [FURTHER NOTE: Should you be the impatient sort, here's the slogan: "Cover the Earth."] There is a sort of beauty in slogan vapidity. We will continue our quest, quixotic though it may be, to identify and honor the individuals who coined these phrases. ---------------------------------------------------------- 2005-12-07 Project Professor-Professor Today marks the beginning of a new undertaking: Project Professor- Professor. Project Professor Professor is a prodigious international effort to identify and list all active research professors whose first and last names are identical. The first two professors celebrated by Project Professor-Professor are Abraham Abraham and Warren Warren. Behold a few details. ABRAHAM ABRAHAM Associate Professor, College of Industrial Management at King Fahd University of Petroleum and Minerals. Abraham Abraham co-authored the popular paper "The Individual Investor and the Weekend Effect." WARREN WARREN Professor of Chemistry, Radiology, and Biomedical Engineering, and Director of the Center for Molecular and Biomolecular Imaging at Duke University. Warren Warren wrote the popular book "The Physical Basis of Chemistry." If you know of other professors who should be part of this listing, please send pertinent info (including a URL, if possible) to: PROJECT PROFESSOR-PROFESSOR c/o ---------------------------------------------------------- 2005-12-08 Alimentary Canal Poet There is a winner in the competition to write an original limerick that illuminates the nature of the study: "The Sensations of the Alimentary Canal," Edwin Boring, American Journal of Psychology, 1915. The winner is INVESTIGATOR TIM POSTON, who produced this ferocious composition: In my bowels two spirits are warring Digesting my intake, and roaring: Sated pleasure and pain Gurgle through me again As classically studied by Boring. And here is Limerick Laureate Martin Eiger's take on the subject: When digestion has sent organs roaring, Here's an article well worth exploring. What is felt in the gut, From the mouth to the butt, Is described in this paper by Boring. ---------------------------------------------------------- 2005-12-09 Knotted Intestines An investigator named Brant (who requests that he be identified only by his first name) recommends, for those who prefer to knit their intestines rather than emote about them, a knitting pattern depicted, and to some extent explained, at ---------------------------------------------------------- 2005-12-10 Watch Roy's Sweeping Success On Friday, December 10, 2005, you can watch Roy Glauber formally receive his Nobel Prize in Physics. Roy, recall, is the man who for ten years has been sweeping paper airplanes from the stage at the Ig Nobel Prize Ceremony. Roy's Nobel Prize honors an earlier, different achievement: "his contribution to the quantum theory of optical coherence." For background and an action photo of Roy sweeping airplanes, see . For the live webcast of Roy receiving his Nobel Prize from the King of Sweden, see . It begins at 4:30 p.m. Stockholm time. ---------------------------------------------------------- 2005-12-11 Mucho Hair (LFHCfS) Inevitably, there are more new members in the Luxuriant Flowing Hair Club for Scientists (LFHCfS). See them at: ---------------------------------------------------------- 2005-12-12 Grasping-for-Pasta Limerick Contest A not-as-famous-as-you-might-expect study of grasping rats is the subject of this month's limerick competition. (Thanks to 2000 Ig Nobel Biology Prize-winner Richard Wassersug for bringing it to our attention.) To enter, compose an original limerick that illuminates the nature of his study: "Skilled Forelimb Reaching for Pasta Guided by Tactile Input in the Rat As Measured by Accuracy, Spatial Adjustments, and Force," M. Ballermann, G. Tompkins, and I.Q. Whishaw, Behavioural Brain Research, vol. 109, April 2000, pp. 49-57. The authors, who are at the University of Lethbridge, in Canada, give an especially informative caption to one of their photographs: "The rat applies different amounts of force to break pasta of differing thicknesses. Thicker spaghetti has a much higher threshold to break than thinner pasta d'angelico." RULES: Please make sure your rhymes actually do, and that your limerick at least pretends to adhere to classic limerick form. PRIZE: The winning poet will receive an indigestible issue of the Annals of Improbable Research. Send entries (one entry per entrant) to: GRASPING-FOR-PASTA LIMERICK CONTEST c/o ---------------------------------------------------------- 2005-12-13 RESEARCH SPOTLIGHT: Persistence Pays Off Each month we select for your special attention a research report that seems especially worth a close read. This month's pick: "Third Time Lucky -- An Unusual Suicide," P.B .Herdson, et al., Medicine, Science, and the Law, vol. 39, no. 3, July 1999, pp. 262-5. The authors attempt to explain what happened: "We present the case of a 39-year-old male who died with three significant and separate shotgun wounds. During the investigation, the possibility of murder was considered, but reconstruction of the case and post-mortem findings led to a coronial conclusion that the death was a suicide, accounted for by the type of weapon used and the stamina of the deceased." ---------------------------------------------------------- 2005-12-14 On Our Blog Here are some recent topics (a new one appears every weekday) in our blog: <> Name that turd <> Odd's not always bad <> Tale of a louse <> Death by red tape <> Sweaters, intensively <> A Theory of Pretty Much Everything <> Equation-O-Mania: Beer Goggles ... and many others Read the blog via ----------------------------------------------------------- 2005-12-15 MAY WE RECOMMEND: Hair 21; Quality of Life (toes) HAIR OF THE FUTURE (CIRCA 1997) "Hair Research for the Next Millennium," Journal of The European Academy of Dermatology and Venereology, I. Ghersetich, vol: 8, no. 3, May 1997, pp. 273. LITTLE THINGS THAT MATTER "Quality of Life in Patients with Toenail Onychomycosis," D.P. Lubeck, et al., Journal of Clinical Outcomes Management, vol. 6, no. 8, 1999, pp. 37-42. (Thanks to Samuel Neff for bringing this to our attention.) ------------------------------------------------------------ 2005-12-16 Improbable Research Events ==> For details and updates see ==> ==> Want to host an event? See: ==> ST. CLOUD STATE UNIVERSITY, ST. CLOUD, MN -- TUES, JAN 17, 2006 Center for Excellence in Teaching and Learning INFO: Frances Condon AAAS ANNUAL MEETING, ST. LOUIS -- FEB, 2006 IMPROBABLE RESEARCH TOUR OF THE UK -- MAR, 2006 PINC CONFERENCE, THE NETHERLANDS -- MAY 16, 2006 ALPBACH TECHNOLOGY FORUM, ALPBACH, AUSTRIA -- AUG, 2006 IG NOBEL TOUR OF AUSTRALIA -- AUG, 2006 2006 IG NOBEL PRIZE CEREMONY -- OCT 5, 2006 Tickets go on sale in August 2006 IG INFORMAL LECTURES -- OCT 7, 2006 -------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------------------------------------- 2005-12-17 How to Subscribe to AIR (*) Here's how to subscribe to the magnificent bi-monthly print journal The Annals of Improbable Research (the real thing, not just the little bits of overflow material you've been reading in this newsletter). ................................................................ Name: Address: Address: City and State: Zip or postal code: Country Phone: FAX: E-mail: ......................................................... SUBSCRIPTIONS (6 issues per year): USA 1 yr/$33 2 yrs/$60 Canada/Mexico 1 yr/$39 US 2 yrs/$65 US Overseas 1 yr/$49 US 2 yrs/$90 US ......................................................... BACK ISSUES are available, too: First issue: $9 USA, $11 Canada/Mex, $17 overseas Add'l issues purchased at same time: $7 each ......................................................... Send payment (US bank check, or international money order, or Visa, Mastercard or Discover info) to: Annals of Improbable Research (AIR) PO Box 380853, Cambridge, MA 02238 USA 617-491-4437 FAX:617-661-0927 ----------------------------------------------------- 2005-12-18 Our Address (*) Annals of Improbable Research (AIR) PO Box 380853, Cambridge, MA 02238 USA 617-491-4437 FAX:617-661-0927 EDITORIAL: marca@chem2.harvard.edu SUBSCRIPTIONS: air@improbable.com WEB SITE: ----------------------------------------------------- 2005-12-19 Please Forward/Post This Issue! (*) Please distribute copies of mini-AIR (or excerpts!) wherever appropriate. The only limitations are: A) Please indicate that the material comes from mini-AIR. B) You may NOT distribute mini-AIR for commercial purposes. ------------- mini-AIRheads ------------- EDITOR: Marc Abrahams (marca@chem2.harvard.edu) MINI-PROOFREADER AND PICKER OF NITS (before we introduce the last few at the last moment): Wendy Mattson WWW EDITOR/GLOBAL VILLAGE IDIOT: Amy Gorin (airmaster@improbable.com) COMMUTATIVE EDITOR: Stanley Eigen (eigen@neu.edu) ASSOCIATIVE EDITOR: Mark Dionne PSYCHOLOGY EDITOR: Robin Abrahams CO-CONSPIRATORS: Alice Shirrell Kaswell, Gary Dryfoos, Ernest Ersatz, S. Drew MAITRE DE COMPUTATION: Jerry Lotto AUTHORITY FIGURES: Nobel Laureates Dudley Herschbach, Sheldon Glashow, William Lipscomb, Richard Roberts (c) copyright 2005, Annals of Improbable Research ----------------------------------------------------- 2005-12-20 How to Receive mini-AIR, etc. (*) What you are reading right now is mini-AIR. Mini-AIR is a (free!) tiny monthly *supplement* to the bi-monthly print magazine. To subscribe, send a brief E-mail message to: LISTPROC@AIR.HARVARD.EDU The body of your message should contain ONLY the words SUBSCRIBE MINI-AIR MARIE CURIE (You may substitute your own name for that of Madame Curie.) ---------------------------- To stop subscribing, send the following message: SIGNOFF MINI-AIR ============================================================