Improbable Research

This drawing of my Great Aunt Grace Walton was made on the occasion of her being awarded the Stokes-Hitton Medal at Leeds many years ago. I was not present, as I was several decades from being conceived, but the event is still talked of in the family. Great Aunt Grace went through her professional life as a man. She was noted and admired as both an inventor and a steam enthusiast. She chaired numerous committees in scientific and industrial societies, and had red hair. We, the family, buried her as a man, and would now like to reverse that error (the gender identification, not the burial per se) in all public records, and to that end would like to hear from anyone who possesses documentation that she was a woman — a fact that was unknown to all of her professional peers during her lifetime — and that she had red hair — a fact that, though well known, was apparently seldom reduced to paper.

Tolbert Walton McKee, Ph.D.
Tooting, UK

(That’s an except from the article “Air Vents,” Published in AIR 13:4.)

Investigator Lee Graham writes:

Do you ever have the suspicion that there is one person — let’s call him Voldemutt — who spends all day, every day, cranking out those crank/crooky web sites?

Here is one of the many fine works of Voldemutt:

Quantum Age Drinking Water Wand
New clinical trial shows an average increase in hydration of 23.5%. The Stirwand is a pocket-sized innovative water technology to maximize your hydration potential and much more. The Stirwand uses the noninvasive resonance of naturally occurring high matrix minerals to get the most out of your water. The Stirwand is the size of a pen, lasts a lifetime, never wears out.

Investigator Poul Robinson writes:

Until today I gave gifts of chocolate unthinkingly — but no more! Dean Radin’s study ["Effects of Intentionally Enhanced Chocolate on Mood"], the highlight of this month’s mini-AIR, has got me thinking.

I did some searching (google, not soul) and found that Dr. Radin says he is quite serious about his discovery. His blog says:

That experiment employed a randomized, placebo-controlled double-blind protocol, which is the gold-standard in medical testing, to see whether chocolate exposed to the good intentions of advanced meditators would make a difference in the mood of people who ate that chocolate, as compared to the same chocolate not exposed to such intentions. The study, a pilot test involving 62 participants, showed that it did indeed make a statistically significant difference.

I admit that I was surprised at the outcome of this test, but data are what they are. The whole purpose of conducting an experiment is to ask questions about how the world works, regardless of our prejudices. And the strength of empiricism is that data always trumps preconceived ideas. If this weren’t so, then we’d all still be living in damp caves eating grubs for dinner.

I suggest that, if the Roman gods are real, and if they are willing to accept a new member to their ranks, they should appoint Dr. Radin to be the god of Valentine’s Day chocolate givers.

I’m either (1) gratified that someone’s decided to test their pet Artificial Intelligence thingamabob by sending a message to us, or (2) disappointed that there are apparently humans who fail the Turing Test.

We received the following unsigned message:

Dear Improbable Research, Can you take back or un issue an “Ig Noble” Prize? More importantly, will you accept an “Un Ig Noble” prize or at least an acknowledgement of your true hidden genius? Nice job Professor Batra! After reading the Ig Noble prize book and your ability to forecast is great. I hope you receive the praise you deserve. You had it right, just the years weren’t nice to you! Improbable research folks need to be sure that these kinds of things can’t happen before issuing an “Ig Noble” prize. I still enjoyed the book immensely. Thanks for the ironic turn of events professor! Would the “poh poh girl give such a genius a “I’m bored” still? Have fun to all!

The Professor Batra in question was awarded the 1993 Ig Nobel Prize in Economics for his books “The Great Depression of 1990″ and “Surviving the Great Depression of 1990″, which (presumably) sold enough copies to single-handedly prevent worldwide economic collapse 18 years ago.

Given Professor Batra’s history of economic prognostication, the primary thing we can take away from his latest book, A New Golden Age, is that the current economic difficulties will likely continue until 2027.

Investigator E.A. Pfefferle writes:

My favorite math books are (with six or five exceptions) self-published. Here is the newest.

Xxxxxx Concrete Contemporary Abstract Algebra Introduction By First Course Radical Solution Dummies: Dummit, Foote, Hungerford, Shifrin, Gallian, Fraleigh, Beachy, Herstein, Saracino, Artin, Deskins, ISBN 1441451579, 100 pages, published 2009.

I xxxxxx’d out the first word of the title, in case you have readers who get the vapors when they see stimulating words. Follow the link to the Amazon.com description of the book and you can see the full title. The author is the pseudonymous Nicolas Bourbaki Junior.

I should say that I have not yet read this book, but I have ordered a copy and am almost eagerly awaiting its arrival. (If upon reading the book I do not enjoy it, I will remove it from my list of favorites.)